The concept of dropping into a friend’s or family’s house for tea and snacks in the early evening with little to zero notice, just doesn’t exist in the States, at least from what I’ve seen. And it’s rare to see anyone liberally inviting family, friends of family, friends of friends, and anyone else with a thread of connection to stay over. I have seen so many Indians open their homes to each other and I have gained a great appreciation for this culture of hospitality.
Before I left for India, anytime I met up with anyone who had any family within 6 hours of Gandhigram, they offered for me to stay and visit with their relatives while I was there. One such invitation came from our close family friend in Seattle who invited me to visit her brother and his wife in Kodaikanal, a hill-station about 4 hours away from Gandhigram. When our friend originally invited me to reach out to them and visit, I thought it was a kind gesture, but I wasn’t really sure if I should trouble them. After all, I’ve never met them.
But after traveling to Kerala and experiencing the joy of being welcomed into the homes of several extended family members, I realized a few things. For one, while I might think of my stay as a burden on the host, it seemed that people were happy to bring new life and laughter into their home. And two, I began to see how much of a connection I could make with people after taking the time to stay with them. Even though I’m independent, I know how much happiness I gain by filling my life with people and relationships. The distance away on the family tree doesn’t matter in the slightest. So after suddenly discovering about a state-wide strike that would keep work slow for the next couple days, I quickly ended up travelling to Kodaikanal. And I had the most truly lovely weekend I could have imagined.
A few days back, I reached out to Bali Uncle (our friend’s brother) mainly to at least say hi, even if visiting didn’t end up being possible. But quickly he responded with tremendous enthusiasm and insisted I come visit. I originally planned to take the bus on Friday evening. But after a meeting on Thursday morning ended with a discussion of how everything would come to a standstill on Friday, I quickly thought to travel up that very afternoon. I wasn’t sure if arriving with such short notice would be ok, but Bali Uncle seemed very excited and we arranged to meet at their bus stand, just 5 hours later that day.
From the moment I arrived in Kodi and hopped into the car with Bali Uncle and his wife Vasu (who refused to let me call her Aunty), I was laughing, and I hardly stopped until they dropped me off at the bus stand a few days later. I’ll get into some of the ways they pampered me this weekend, but more importantly, they are two of the most adorable, fun-loving, and caring people I’ve met. Their energy is infections. They bicker in a hilarious manner, are full of ridiculous jokes and stories, and they cared for me like their own daughter.
Kodi, being at such a high altitude, maintains a cool and pleasant climate year-round. I even wore a cardigan, which I wouldn’t dare touch at Gandhigram. There are no mosquitoes, I slept on a big bed, and even got to take a hot shower! Vasu and Bali Uncle have learned organic farming and cheese-making during some of their world traveling, and I thoroughly reaped the benefits of their passion for good food. They grow more broccoli and avocados than they know what to do with, along with beans, salad greens, squash, cauliflower, and tons more. And then there is the fruit, which I enjoyed both fresh from the tree and in delicious desserts. Bali Uncle is apparently one of the top cheese-makers in India (according to an article they discovered about themselves recently), and I can confirm that the cheese is excellent. After adjusting to a traditional South-Indian diet of simple, starchy foods, each meal in their home felt special and nourishing. People told me it would be a year before I ate another salad when I left for India, which might have been true had it not been for this weekend. It was fascinating to see how they could be living such a different life in India than I ever knew existed.
Aside from the food that I could rave continuously about, the three of us were generally going around having a jolly time. We went on beautiful walks/hikes in the morning. We played board games after breakfast. We walked through their garden and explored their farm. We dropped in and had coffee with their close friends. We read books. We went out for drinks and snacks. We baked and made cheese. We sat around for hours and talked about the world, told stories of our lives, and became deeply attached to each other.
Two days went by too quickly and we dragged our feet when planning my departure. They plotted ways to keep me around for good. Vasu even baked me a cake which she packed in an extra nice Tupperware as an added guarantee that we would see each other again soon. In the car on the way to the bus stand, we each said a silly and cute goodbye speech which we applauded dramatically. They thanked me for taking the trouble to see them and I thanked them for taking the trouble to have me, but nothing about the weekend had been troublesome. I am so grateful that they welcomed me so spontaneously, that we got along and connected so closely, and that I had the opportunity to go on such a loving adventure. I saw a new part of India, experienced a different way of living in India, made new family and friends, and added another enriching experience to my journey.
Below are some photos from various walks and stunning views. The top photo is of the garden vegetables we picked for lunch. The last three photos are of the special final lunch we had. The cheesecake we baked started from milk, then became homemade cream cheese, and finally a delicious dessert.
